Me and the Four Star Generals

Growing up with lots of family in the military sort of made me oblivious to the whole rank structure. My dad was a chief when he retired and I figured that was no biggie. I mean hey, he was my dad! Not really that scary. As a teenager I even felt a little indignant towards those pushy military Dr.’s with lots of rank. Who did they think they were anyway?

It didn’t take me long to re-adjust my thinking once I got to basic training. I soon realized that EVERYONE, including lowly airman schmeperson over there who’s only been in the military for six months, had infinitely more power and authority than dingy little me. Now compare airman schmeperson to an officer. Most of my basic training flight would’ve wanted to run away and throw up in a corner if they saw one coming towards them. What about a four star general? This person has attained the highest rank possible in the military. May as well just die on the spot right? Luckily I never had to meet one of those personally or talk to them, or even make eye contact. Even after I got used to the military I think that would’ve been too much for me.

Now bear with a random change of subject for a few minutes. Most reserved parking in the civilian world isn’t anything significant. You’ve got handicapped parking…maybe some “10 minute or get towed” parking. That’s pretty much it. Other than that you’re on your own finding a spot in the back 40. Not in the military. Those four star generals? They’ve got at least one spot at darn near every building on every base in the world. It’s right next to the door and no one ever parks there other than them. (Well, their driver anyway). There’s also parking for Chiefs. Turns out they're a little more important than I thought….Ahem. Sorry dad.

Here’s where it gets good. You’ve got all these special parking spots for all the really scary people in the military who could smother you with a look, and guess who else gets a spot up front? Pregnant women! Pretty much since I’ve been old enough to think a Chief isn’t scary I’ve been hoping that one day I would get to park in one. Is that creepy? I didn’t want babies. I just wanted the cool spot. I even waited until I was quite visibly pregnant to start parking in them lest some passerby accuse of me of using the spot illegally! (I only feared this because I’d questioned many womens’ pregnancy status under my breath while driving by them to my far away parking location in years past).

So yea, all of that was to say…it’s me and the four star generals now, baby. Thanks, Jackson.